The story so far. Micheal Steele and band of trusty Republicans were evicted from Park Place on Fantasy Island. They sailed off on the S.S. Minnow, Bernie Madoff's old yacht and got into a terrible storm. The ship was beached on Republicans island and has been setting up camp for the past weekend.
Michaels Steel, the condescending millionaire, asked for a strategy meeting today with skipper Mitt, the Professor Newt, the actress Sarah, and Carry Prejean, the beauty contestant. George W. Bush is the radio announcer.
Micheal Steele: This “Party of No” thing is starting to hurt the Republicans. We need something more positive.
“What do you think, Skipper Mitt?” Said Steele.
Skipper Mitt, suggested the Party of Middle, “I have always tried to work things out in the middle. Sometimes I'm a bit liberal and sometimes a bit conservative.”
Michale Steele said that the Party of the Middle would not appeal to conservatives. He also told Mitt that his Magick Mormon morphin' underwear was showing. Mitt went back to the wreck of S.S. Minnow to fix his pants.
Michele Bachmann who plays Bachagain, suggested that the GOP become the Party of Jesus. This has worked well for me in Minnesota except at a charter school.
Michael Steele indicated that would alienate some mainline Christians, Muslims and Jews because Bachagain was an evangelical. He asked Bachagain to get him some water.
He then turned to the actress, Sarah. Sarah was sitting on the freshly skinned hide of what appeared to be lowland mountain gorilla, an endangered species.
“Where did you get that hide,” asked Michale Steele. <
Oh, us girls from Alaskie, have our ways,” smiled Sarah. It was very tasty after I marinated it in buttermilk for a day. It is sure hot today, isn't it.
She thought the party of religion might work. “Dontcha know, I'm an evangelical like Bachagain, too. Skipper Mitt is an evangelical,too, but he is in that Mormon cult. “
Steele turned to Professor Newt. I am authority on new Republican ideas and I think the “Party of Maybe” will work. This won't offend conservatives. independents or any of our religious base.
At this point a handsome Skipper Mitt walked back into the hut. He hair was immaculate and you couldn't see his Magick morphin' Mormon underwear anymore.
That's not bad, professor, but how about the Party of Perhaps. It has more alliteration is it.
Bachagain jumped up with her fist raised. “Who called me illiterate. I'm not illiterate. I read the Bible every day.
Micheal Steele told Bachagain to go get him so more water. He assured her the conversation was not about her.
“What a bozo, Steele muttered under his breath after Bachagain has left the room.
Carie Prejean, the beauty contestant, also piped up, “What about gay and lesbian marriage. You know how I feel about that. “
Michael Steele said, “Carrie you know how we all fell about that, too. But sometimes you just have to say 'perhaps.'
“Hey,” said the professor, “someone on the radio said the Coast Guard is looking for us, but they will call the search off tomorrow if they don't find us. A conservative group called the Resurgent Republicans is hoping they don't find us. We''ll how is that for party unity?”
By the way who is that mumble fuq the radio? Is he speaking Spanglish?
In the next episode of Republicans Island, the Bobby Gin Doll.
Contact Rightardia: eelder1@gmail.com
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